What is Paleo? and 10 Reasons to Try Eating Paleo

I once read that if you take a break from blogging, you should never mention the absence, excuse it, or apologize for it.
Here I am, ready to do all three.

1) Hi. Nice to see you again.
2) Iʻve been on a diet and I kind of hate it.
3) Iʻm sorry.

If I didnʻt do those things, Iʻd be that douchey guy in the movie that knocks on the door, sits on the couch like its owner, like heʻd never left, when really he walked out on her three months ago without explanation. And if she said, "Hey, whereʻve you been?" heʻd roll his eyes like caring made her weak. (Yeah. Iʻve seen lots of terrible movies.)

Well, caring is what brings me back. Thank you for caring.

If you follow me on instagram then you probably know allllll about what Iʻve been eating, since thatʻs my record keeper these days. Please let me know if you have an account-- Iʻm all about seeing what youʻre eating too. I have friends that roll their eyes about this (caring about every day food makes you weak) but I really do want to see what deliciousness you had for dinner, even though Iʻd probably tear it out of your hands if you had it in front of me.

I get asked a lot, "What is Paleo?" and I always feel a little silly answering that question, because it sounds kind of crazy.

Basically, itʻs...

Protein (meat, fish, eggs, nuts, seeds)
A lot of vegetables
Some fruit

And thatʻs it.

I donʻt exactly buy all of the caveman theory behind it, so I wonʻt get into that, but here are my reasons for paleo.

The 10 Reasons You Should Try Paleo

1) You will probably lose weight. (I say probably, because if you eat ten pieces of bacon every day Iʻm sure you wonʻt, but in general, youʻll probably lose weight.)

2) You wonʻt be eating sugar.

3) Your normal cravings will slow down. You will probably still be hungry, but the "I need to eat this whole box of doughnuts to fill this void" kind of craving will slow down significantly.

4) You will be eating whole, real foods, which means youʻll feel better that youʻre not eating processed crap and chemicals. Thereʻs a big emphasis on organic as well.

5) You wonʻt feel full and sluggish after meals. I have this problem, where I eat until I am past full. When Iʻm eating Paleo, I NEVER feel that way. When you cheat and have a meal where you eat 4 pieces of pizza, something you didnʻt even think about before, you feel totally sick and you want to never eat pizza again (you will, of course, want to eat pizza again by the next day).

6) Bacon.

7) You will eat so many more vegetables.  I feel really happy with myself when I am eating tons of veggies. It just feels right.

8) Your eating will become more mindful. No more of this "Iʻll just grab a few chips..." only to eat the whole bag. Snacking is pretty much gone.

9) Less joint pains. Iʻve read a lot of accounts of paleo dieters claiming that their fibromyalgia and other significant diseases are cured. I even read one account that claimed her plaque was gone. Iʻm not about to believe all of that, but I have been dealing with achy joints for my whole life, and they always seem to flare up when I donʻt drink enough water and when I eat a lot of carbs or sugar. When Iʻm doing well with my Paleo diet, I donʻt have achy joints. Zip. At first I thought it was coincidental, but I canʻt deny it any longer.

10) Youʻre eating and youʻre eating good for you food. I am very wary of diets that just make me feel hungry and sick and I have to count calories all day long and youʻre still allowed to eat all of the boxed jello you want. Iʻm still hungry. Just not sick.

Now, it wouldnʻt be fair if I didnʻt list some cons. The biggest one is that eating is a very social thing, and Iʻm often feeling left out, even at home with my family. 50% of the time Iʻm making something no one else wants to eat and the other 50% of the time Iʻm jealous of what everyone else is eating. Itʻs very difficult to find a balance with that. Then thereʻs all the food I have to say No to, and it really makes it very clear just how much food is part of your social life. Mostly everyone thinks youʻre a bit weird and obsessed. Unfortunately, if youʻre on a diet, you kind of have to be. That can be dangerous too. Thereʻs dieting cross over into lifestyle cross over into eating disorder.

Another big con is that youʻre eating a lot of meat. I used to eat vegetarian and vegan most of the time. Iʻm still struggling with that. I donʻt really like that Iʻm eating so much meat, but I feel very weak and tired if I donʻt. I also donʻt believe that a lot of meat is good for you for the long run. Iʻm definitely going to add back in whole grains when I reach my target weight.

There are other cons, namely dairy, beans, peanut butter, and sugar. Those are huge. And boy, does that suck.

Iʻm not at 100% Paleo. Iʻve been kind of dancing around it because the cons are big ones and especially when I like to cook and bake, itʻs hard. Iʻve been eating about 85% Paleo which means I mess up for about 3 meals a week. I also exercise every day, and I think if you go Paleo you have to do that because youʻre eating so much protein it really needs to go somewhere. I donʻt think this is a sedentary lifestyle kind of diet.

If you are looking for a diet to reverse some of your bad habit eating and are trying to lose weight in a way that isnʻt about crash-dieting, I suggest you try Paleo. Try it for thirty days and see if you think itʻs worth all the hype. And then write to me and mourn all of the things we love to eat that we canʻt.

For now Iʻm all about eating whatever I can thatʻs delicious.

Paleo Fried Rice (serves 2)

·      2 tsp coconut oil

·      1 Cup Cauliflower stalk and leaves

·      1 red or yellow bell pepper

·      1 small onion

·      1 small carrot, peeled

·      3 cloves garlic

·      1/2 C ham (not deli meat—from a slice of whole ham)

·      3 slices bacon

·      1 ½ tsp coconut aminos (very similar to soy sauce)

·      ½ tsp sesame oil

·      salt and pepper to taste

·      1 medium zucchini, grated

·      2 eggs, lightly beaten

1.     Chop the cauliflower stalk, bell pepper, onion, and carrot into very small dice, about ¼”. Heat the coconut oil in a wok over high heat. Toss all of the vegetables in at once and stir fry, tossing around vegetables quickly with a wooden spoon. After a few minutes, the onion should start to become translucent and the vegetables start sweating.

2.     Mince the garlic and chop the ham and bacon in very small dice as well. Add the garlic and meats to the pan and keep tossing together. Keep frying until the veggies seem mostly dry, a couple of minutes more.

3.     Add the soy sauce, sesame oil, salt, and pepper. Stir and then make a little pocket on the side of the pan for the eggs. Pour in the eggs and stir them around to cook like scrambled eggs. Once the eggs are cooked add the zucchini. Toss until the zucchini is just tender. This goes from fresh and light to soggy, quickly. Serve while still hot. 

Donʻt worry, Iʻm not going to become an exclusively Paleo blogger. Youʻll just be seeing a lot more Paleo for a while.

Picky, picky.

How do you like his wings?

This little guy hates food.

He eats: macaroni and cheese, bread, rice, fruit, beans, cheese. Anything white or light brown.

He won’t eat: meat, vegetables, anything green. 95% of what I’m cooking these days.

I don’t make him anything special. I put out what I’m making for dinner and I rarely even give him a plate, because he looks at what we’re eating, and takes off. I also rarely make any of the foods he does eat, other than beans, so he skips meals pretty constantly, even though the doctor has told me “He’ll eat whatever you give him if you don’t give in.” I think it’s a lie that “kids will eat when they’re hungry.” The kid is definitely hungry. He eats like a monster if we serve anything he actually likes. He’s also a pipsqueak when his height is compared to his weight. Jake and I both have recently started just feeding him whatever the fattiest caloric things he will eat when we have them.

If I put a food into his mouth, he spits it out before he tastes it, or just closes his lips so tightly I can’t get it in. He doesn’t care how many times he goes in time out and he doesn’t care about the bribe of dessert. He wants the dessert, so badly, and he will scream about it, but he will NEVER eat that bite of food you want him to eat.

I just can’t understand this. Part of me gets that there are people in this world that could care less if they eat their spaghetti with canned tomato sauce (and I know some of them), but also part of me thinks if they just could taste something better, they would be instantly converted.

I guess it’s not true. Some people don’t care about food.

I can barely believe it. Like, if I make some Korean tacos, there is no way Mozely will even try it. And I think there are people out there that even if I got them to take a bite of this Korean Taco, that they would prefer Taco Bell in a heartbeat. Mozely better not be one of those people when he grows up. He and I will not get along.

My favorite taco truck, the Tiki Truck, has “crack sauce” (the recipe of which I would pay a pretty price), and I just try my darndest to make a creamy coleslaw to remind me of it, especially now that he just announced he’s closing down the truck until further notice.

I wrote an article about Korean Tacos that is coming out in the paper tomorrow. These aren’t the pictures that I submitted for that article but they look pretty good too. I am missing tortillas as of this moment, because I went back on my Paleo diet.

(Remember tip #1? Man, I’ve been repeating that one a lot lately.)

So here’s my thought about food, for today, but they relate to diets too.

Tip #5: Try something new.

Some Paleo and Clean Eating people I’ve been paying attention to, that actually make good looking food.

Andy Doanut

PaleOMG

Ghitae

and Emma, a friend from High School who was an exchange student from Australia. Her food is wonderful.

By the way, I’m on Instagram. A lot. It’s the new Facebook and food blog. I’ll see you there.

Bacon Wrapped Enoki Mushrooms

Some days you really fall off the wagon. You wake up in a pissy mood because there are more tasks than minutes, and your daughter can’t find her shoes because she leaves every pair she wears in the car that your husband took to work so you’re really late to work and dropping her off, and after third period you realize some kid in your class actually used their gum to make little sticky stands on the bottom of your water bottle, and at noon you realize that there isn’t enough food in your lunch sack because you were being optimistic this morning, and when you get home everyone is eating Limited Edition Lemon Oreos while you search frantically for something to put in your mouth before you cry.

Then you spend the 5 hours you have after school, even though you have a billion things to do, shopping and planning and cooking to make the best amazing yogurt dessert so that you can win a trip to NYC to see Bobby Flay, even though you can’t eat yogurt. Then you make your husband drive to the studio to get your photography lights and set everything up and spend even more time taking pictures and editing them. And you sit down with minutes to spare to enter said contest, only to realize that the deadline was midnight Eastern Standard time, not Pacific Standard time.

I had a day like that this week.

You know what I did?

I ate my dessert. Yogurt and coconut panna cotta and crumble with a lilikoi top. And it was amazing. It would definitely have won that contest. Paleo diets don’t stand a chance against really bad days.

But I’m back on the wagon.

Tip #3: Start over. Again.

I started off again strong the next day and when someone offered me cookies, twice, that day, I knew I’d feel bad about messing up. I think especially with something strict like this, you have to be very committed to it, but you also have to allow for some mistakes.

Put most of your savings in the bank of health, and you’ll have a little to spare for the occasional Doritos splurge or those lemon bars you’ve been wanting to make.

It doesn’t hurt if your diet allows for bacon wrapped Enoki mushrooms.

I’ve used this recipe on my blog before, but I’m really reveling in the fact that I can eat bacon whenever I feel like it. Ok, so maybe I don’t eat it whenever I feel like it, but I eat it pretty dang often.

I’m not super into trying to force every food into a substitution for Paleo, so I try to find, as often as possible, foods that already fit the bill. I think I’ve done well trying to eat mostly normal looking foods, rather than trying to trick myself that vegetables can be cut and cooked to look like carbs.

Bacon Wrapped Enoki Mushrooms (wrapped in lettuce leaf)

Good as a snack, appetizer, or part of a meal

• 1 package of Enoki mushrooms, stems trimmed
• 4 pieces of bacon, cut into thirds
• romaine lettuce

1. Split your mushrooms into little sections to go inside your bacon slices. Wrap the bacon around the mushrooms. You can either secure this with a toothpick or you can be like me and just plan to sear it on the overlapping edge first.

2. Heat a non stick pan to medium high heat. Put the bacon wrapped enoki into the hot pan, the ends facing down. The sear should help seal it. Keep rolling the little bundles around as they begin to golden in the pan until the bacon is cooked. The mushroom heads should get golden.

3. Wrap in pieces of romaine lettuce and eat immediately.

  

Canned Salad, 3 Ways

Amaya said to me, “I think you should stop your Paleo diet.”

“Why?”

“Because I feel bad eating food in front of you.”

I wish everyone in my family felt bad about the seemingly more than ever amounts of carbs and sweets that are in our cupboards lately. Most of these extreme eating plans require you to purge your cupboards but most of these people are not married to a Jake. But we can’t all look like Greek gods and eat Pop Tarts for breakfast, granola bars for snacks, and cookies for dessert now can we.

It’s when I start looking through our carb-laden cupboards that I start feeling weak in the knees. I can’t say enough about having something planned when you’re on a diet.

Tip #2: Take Away Choice and Plan Your Meals (especially when you’re feeling strong)

I’m strongest in the morning. I don’t have much temptation to eat crap before 11 am. It’s easiest for me to follow my diet when I’m at school. That’s because any meals or snacks I have are already packed. I don’t get a choice. I’m a person who hates planning dinners for the week. I want to look in my fridge and make something. I want to go shopping for whatever whim I have that day. I really dislike having no choices, but this does make it way easier.

I still end up having a choice for dinner, but one choice is easier than many choices.

The “Salad in a Jar” has been making the Pinterest crowd rounds, and I decided to try them out for my lunches.

I can’t really stand to eat only a salad for dinner, but salad for lunch is fine. It was a lot of work to make 5 salads, but I appreciated not having to prepare anything for the rest of the week. If I wanted it to be easier, I would make the same 5 salads and change it up every week. Now that I’m eating Paleo, I would need to change these recipes a bit, but there are a million variations on this theme.

The basic principle is, wet and heavy on the bottom, dry on the top. That didn’t quite sound right, but it is. The pieces at the bottom soak into the dressing and make it extra good. The lettuce should not be touching anything wet. This one was the last salad I had that week and it was still perfectly fresh. I used old peach jars, and some large canning jars.

Canned Cobb Salad

Dressing:

• 1 T greek yogurt
• 1/2 t mayo
• 1 t mustard
• 1/8 t honey

1. Whisk the ingredients together and put in the bottom of a large, tall jar.

• 1/4 C shredded carrot
• 1/4 C peas (cooked)
• 2 T minced onion
• 3 T broccoli, chopped, florets only
• 2 slices bacon, chopped
• 1 boiled egg, chopped
• 1 T sunflower seeds
• 1 1/2 C romaine lettuce, chopped

1. Layer the salad in the order as shown, into the jar. When ready to eat, empty it out into a large bowl.

Tex-Mex Canned Salad

• 2 t balsamic
• 1 T salsa
• 1/4 C bell pepper, diced
• 1/3 C shredded chicken
• 1/4 C cooked corn
• 1/4 C black beans
• 2 T cheese
• 1 T olives, sliced
• 2 1/2 C romaine lettuce, chopped

1. Mix the balsamic and salsa together and spoon into the bottom of a large jar. Layer the other ingredients in the order as shown with the lettuce on top.

Canned Japanese Salad

Dressing

• 1 T white miso paste
• 1 T water
• 1 t rice vinegar
• 1 t sugar
• 1/2 t peanut butter
• 1/8 t sesame oil

1. Whisk the ingredients together until well blended. Put the dressing as the bottom layer of the jar.

• 1/2 C chicken
• 1/4 C thinly sliced bell pepper
• 2 T pickled daikon and carrot (prepared or homemade)
• 3 T edamame beans, cooked
• 1/4 C sliced cucumber
• 2 T green onion (white and light green parts only)
• 1/2 C thinly sliced cabbage
• 1 1/2 C romaine lettuce

1. Layer the ingredients in the order shown in the jar. Eat within 2 days.

Other posts in this series:

Tip #1 and a Mango and White Chocolate Tart

Mango Tart with White Chocolate Pastry Cream (and Lilikoi Glaze) and Momentum

I am currently in survival mode.

I’m 80 days into diets and exercise and I’m looking for a more appropriate name for what I’m doing, perhaps, the, “I hate food” phase.

I’ve been reading a lot of blogs and looking at a lot of tumblrs of a completely foreign variety for me. There’s a group of people that get off on how ridiculously healthy they can be and not be turned off by the fact that their food looks like dog barf. 

It makes me realize that you have to be a little obsessive to lose a significant amount of weight. I’m not even the least bit interested in “thigh gap” so I know I’m not in danger of eating disorders, but you have to think about food and exercise pretty constantly. It’s easy to see how people cross that barrier between healthy and unhealthy thinking about the human body.

There’s something to be said for momentum. I’ve always been pretty fit, and still can run and hike despite any of my sizes, but now that I’ve finished Insanity once I can’t seem to stop myself from waking up at 5:30am every morning. I also am not interested in any workout that seems easier than Insanity.

I went from a diet of five 300-calorie meals a day (including carbs and occasional desserts) to Paleo about a week ago. I don’t think this will be a forever thing for me, but I’m trying it out for a month. So far I hate it but it’s more effective. The momentum helps keep me going.

I made this tart several weeks ago. It was a little easier to cheat on that diet. A huge thing I’ve missed while I’ve been doing all of this is the lack of pretty food.

I’d like to get momentum for blogging again. I’m starting a series of posts of foods that have been getting me through these last couple of months and what helps me stick to it. Probably most of you don’t have the same difficulty with all of this that I have, but if you do, I totally get it. It sucks. And almost nothing anyone says helps.

Tip #1: Gain Momentum. Make a commitment to a week (making a public announcement helps) and pretty soon you’ll feel like you have to do it because you’ve been doing it so long. Because, yes, a week feels like forever in the “I hate food” phase. You can email me and complain about it if you like. I know that’s what I like to do.

Does it seem weird to start a series of diet posts with a gorgeously fatty dessert? Not in my mind.

When I’m 30 lbs lighter, I might eat a whole one myself, if I ever get there.

Mango Tart with White Chocolate Pastry Cream (and Lilikoi Glaze)

1 tart crust (pate sucree), baked and cooled (I used the Cook’s Illustrated recipe), still in the pan.

1 recipe chilled White Chocolate Pastry Cream (Recipe Below)

1 mango, thinly sliced

1 recipe lilikoi glaze (recipe below), still warm

1) Assemble the tart by filling the crust with the pastry cream. Spread it evenly over the bottom of the tart. Fan the mango slices starting from the middle and working outwards. Dip a brush into the glaze and flick the glaze all over the fruit. Chill until serving, several hours is best. Remove the tart from the pan just before serving.

White Chocolate Pastry Cream (adapted from Cook’s Illustrated Pastry Cream Recipe)

• 1 Cup cream
• 1 Cup milk
• 6 Tbsp sugar, divided
• pinch table salt
• 5 egg yolks
• 3 Tbsp cornstarch
• 4 oz chopped white chocolate
• 3 Tbsp cold, unsalted butter, cut into pieces

1. Heat cream, milk, and 4 Tbsp sugar in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Stir frequently until simmering.
2. While the milk is heating, whisk together 2 Tbsp sugar with egg yolks until the sugar dissolves and it looks very creamy. Whisk in the cornstarch and stir rapidly for 30 more seconds. The liquid should be pale and thick. Once the cream and milk is simmering, temper the yolks by slowly streaming in 1 Cup of the hot cream as you whisk. Whisk constantly while doing this. Then combine the yolks into the pan, whisking as you pour, and stir constantly until the pastry cream becomes thick and barely begins to bubble. This should take about 30 seconds. Don’t wait too long or the cream will curdle.
3. Take the pan off the heat and toss in the white chocolate. Whisk constantly until the chocolate is completely melted. Stir in the unsalted butter.
4. Put the hot pastry cream in a pan or wide bowl. Place plastic wrap directly on the surface and let the cream chill in the refrigerator until very cold, about four hours or overnight.

Lilikoi Glaze:

• 1/2 Cup lilikoi puree
• 1/3 Cup sugar

1. In a small saucepan, whisk together the lilikoi and sugar over medium high heat. Stirring often, bring the lilikoi to a high simmer. Stir until the lilikoi is reduce and thick enough to spread. Make sure the lilikoi glaze is still very warm when you apply it to the mango. Flick and paint the glaze on the top of the mangos.

Voodoo and other Dieting Dilemmas

I get angry when I am on a diet. I’ll tell you why. When I’m dieting:

1) Nabisco comes out with three new flavors of Oreos. WTH, Nabisco. I want to punch your face.

2) Foodland’s weekly reward is a box of Love’s doughnuts. I am canceling my Maika’i membership immediately in retaliatory disgust.

3) My kids start eating tons of crap food, so much so that Amaya actually groans when Jake pulls out a box of Mac and Cheese. I just want to dive into that Mac and Cheese so I feel like she is being the whiniest girl on the planet.

4) I am eating tons of lettuce. When I am rich I am going to go buy up the salad industry and put it in a trash can.

5) I am not cooking. It’s barely called cooking when you’re eating 300 calorie meals and weighing chicken breasts. Poor girls, they’re only 4 oz.

6) I have not lost one pound while being on this diet for 15 days, 6 hours, and 18 minutes (and doing Insanity). I hate my scale so much but I also feel completely co-dependent.

7) I hate food blogging and all the people I follow on Instagram that take pictures of their food. You people suck.

8) I hate other people eating food. Don’t eat food around me. Even if you are eating salad I will hate you.

9) Editing these pictures was torture.

10) I never have fun.

It’s true. People who eat have more fun.

When we were in Oregon (Before Dieting: B.D.), I was standing in line at Voo doo Doughnuts, experimenting with stuffed burgers, enjoying my mother’s gourmet Japanese cooking, tasting salted caramel ice cream from the Salt and Straw cart, and having lunch at the food truck pod near my dad’s office. I don’t care if Voo Doo Doughnuts’ actual doughnut isn’t the best there is—the toppings save them. Yes, that is a fried fritter topped with chocolate and peanut butter and chocolate chips. Yes, that is a Easy Peasy Lemon Keesey. Yes, that is an Old Dirty Bastard with Oreos. Yes, that is a maple bacon doughnut. I got a little lazy with the photos because I was trying to stuff my face in doughnut orgy. 

Portland has a lot of good sandwiches, which is probably my favorite meal. And that sandwich in the bottom right corner is, actually, a Big A** sandwich. Fries in a sandwich. Tell me that is not the best sandwich you have ever tasted through a screen.

Except the one just on the left of that might beat it. The Schnitzelwich is the European Katsu sandwich, and I appreciate the Horseradish sauce. If I was near this food truck pod I would be in big trouble. My dad and I had a cook off of burger recipes for our July 4th BBQ. I’m not sure which I liked better, but I really like blue cheese in burgers, and American cheese on burgers is much better than cheddar, despite my preferences for real food over colored cheese gelatin. Real pineapple beats out canned pineapple, though.

I’m really lucky my family likes food as much as I do. We even took the kids to two fancy restaurants and ate pork belly dishes at both places. I was much too busy eating to take pictures, so you’ll have to settle for my Instagram (yes! I hate myself!). Mom wanted to try this watermelon popsicles recipe she got off a food blog. It was super cute. I would like to try to make more of a sherbet style one. Lime sherbet, by the way, is highly underrated. Jake and I also ate all through our anniversary, and hiked to a few waterfalls in between.   I have been married to this man for 11 years. I really don’t get tired of him at all, which is the wonder of being married to someone this awesome. He’s been good about picking up the slack since being on a diet makes me completely lazy and pissy. Kind of like what I would be like if I actually had PMS.

Amaya said a couple of days ago, “I want some chocolate, because I’m on a diet. That’s what you eat when you’re on a diet.”

I looked at Jake with my most evil stare and said, “Not. One. Word.”